Pillar...

Man this last week has been a total roller coaster. I'm trying to get ready for finals, all my friends who went away for school are back in town and everybody wants to kick it. My all time Nemesis did the unthinkable which in someways made me very angry. Oh so check this out back in the day we used to have foster kids and they were like family not even like we were a family. We had two girls Heather, and Shyann and my two bro Ronny, and Tony. So my brother my best friend the person I trust with my life Rko (Ronny) calls and tells me he ask his girlfriend to marry him. God I wanted to shoot him in the face, like why would any one want to get married now a days especially since more than half end in divorce. But as mad as I was at him, I was still super happy. Me and Ronny used to talk about having normal lives with normal families. We wanted to be the guys or father never were for us ya know. Neither one of us actually had any idea what or so called normal was. I'm glad though that he will have a special young lady in his life, and at least one of us can try and find that normalcy we both desire. Oh ya and I'm the best man at the wedding, and his fiance's friends are super hot. "BONUS"!!! OK so all the peeps are back in town it really was amazing to see everybody. Ive got like 600 pics from this week ill post some once I finished editing them. The old flame Carly was here, my boy Coi', Dasha, Ryan, Justin, the twins Staci, and Summer. It was the best all the original team back together. We drove up to Prescott, paid our respects to one of fallen members parents who also let us crash which was sick. For all of you who don't know one of our friends was killed by a drunk driver last year. He was driving home from a family members house and was hit by some drunken D-bag. He was a good kid and didn't deserve what happened to him. But that life ya know things just happen for no good reason. His mom was super stoked to see us all though idk it took my mind of everything that's going on in my own life. So back to my Nemesis, so as far as I can think back me and him having been going at it. Him wanting me to fall me wanting to see him crash and burn. Finally after years I guess the feud is over, he fell to the waist side. I cant say that I'm actually happy about it though. At first I was so happy about it I know that's pretty messed up but if you knew the hatred that brewed between us you'd understand. But now it just makes me sad, I mean all the times he called me out tryn to say I was the bad one and now hes gone. I wonder if he knew how many people looked up to him and loved him. He had everything in the palm of his hand. Id give anything to have people care about me like that and make me sad and angry to see him throw that all away. OK moving on so you know me Mr. always looking for change I think I want to put Australia back on the table, and the peace core, and last but not least going away to school. If I go away to school it would just be for a years considering that I only have one whole school year left. Idk Ive always been searching for that missing part of my life and I thought I finally found it, but now I'm not so sure. My littlest cousin is almost old enough for school, which mean that my bio-family will be packing up and going back east because my family is built on tradition and legacy. So she will have to misfortune of going to Eden Hall prep academy trust me when I say its a breeding ground for the snobs of America. I had to go there for a while before I couldn't take it any more. More so we moved to this god forsaken place lol. So Ive got a lot to think about, I don't wanna make a decision to fast. well that's it for now love and peace.

Blah...

Hello out there it definitely has been a while since my last blog update, sorry Ive been pretty busy. I think the last time I blogged I was just finishing midterms, any ways lets see idk not much has really gone on. Well there a few things, My full on emotional break down, me almost getting fired, and the whole Bri situation. Lets start with the first one shall we most of you think of me as a happy gregarious kind of guy. Ya OK me at all honestly I hate being around a lot of people, I'm always analyzing every situation, plus im slightly nuratic when im not 100% in control. In the psycology world there are two types of personalities, type A or type B. Type A people tend to display their emotions very easyly and often. They can be very agressive and seem careless. Type B people are mellow slow to anger, they try and rationalize bad situation to make them ok. they dont say whats on their minds, they also hold alot of things in. Type B people though have a minor glitch, there exploders. That mean you can push them and push them to their breaking point, but then they explode all their sadness and anger just come flying out. My psych teacher is doing evaluations on us right now, and Im a very reseerved person I have some dark secrets and things that to keep private. Well just say he pushed me to my limits and focus in alot of things that I need to deal with. Idk for some reason thought it unraveled my entire world, and that was not good. I pretty much went off the deep end, which led me to all most getting fired from my job. Ya so im already a toothpick away from loosing all control and my boss just happened to push to far. So I told him what I thought about him and my job. Ya bad move he sent me home and made me write a letter about how I wanted to keep my job. At first I didnt want to do it but I finally came to my senses and wrote it. He didnt fire me thank god believe it or not i knida like my job. During this whole situaton though there was one glimmer of light my very good friend Bri. If you know me well you know I dont tell alot of people how I feel. I keep my stuff to me my burdon to bare, but me and bri have been there for each other though some crazy times and I let her in to my little world. We were good together for about a minute cuz then I got a strong reality check by two people I love and will always love.
Oh and one other thing my mama, (she's not really my mom but i wish she was) called me a player, it made me laugh. but seriously though im so far from being a player is crazy, and yes I do crush alot but im no player. I like alot of girls but love only one. When I meet that girl she will know that she is the center of my universe, the queen of my castle, my best friend without question. Sorry P one day I may have to replace you. Love all ya peace.